What do you DO all day as a stay-at-home-mom? I asked that question before becoming a Mom. I asked that question during the 6 weeks I stayed home with Pete before returning to work. I even asked it when I became a full-time-if-temporary-for-the-next-decade SAHM in January 2009.
I had a wonderfully clean home, with fresh-baked bread, homemade meals, lots of playdates and time at the gym for me. Then the second one arrived and I dropped a few of those, bought the bread, still cook from scratch, the house isn't always spotless, (in fact it can be downright dirty!) and I don't have nearly as many playdates and story hours. Now that I'm pregnant with the third one, and I'm feeling exhausted and nauseous, I'm not doing the things I normally do. I've only been sick for a few days and my house looks like a bomb went off.
I must not have wiped down the table after dinner last night, it's sticky and there are smudges of the playdough that entertained the kids while we cooked dinner. I managed to do the dishes, but the extra bowl from last night's late night brownie baking is still in the sink. There are pile of laundry on the bed to be folded. They were on the bed last night, I tossed them back in the basket, and then poured them back on the bed after I made it this morning. If you see my children this week, they'll be in wrinkled clothes.
Today I've snuggled in my bed, changed a few diapers (and yes, at this point, I'm using disposable because the diaper bin is full, but I can't keep up with our clothes, let alone the diapers) served CEREAL for breakfast instead of eggs and toast (that's such a sin!), bribed children to be still with brownies, blown bubbles from the couch, watched Spiderman on the ipad with Pete.
I see what a mess surrounds me, and I can't bring myself to get off the couch (laying, not even sitting up) to do a thing about it. While the kids are napping, I will be napping too. At least I showered, which is more than I can say about yesterday. Someone please tell me I'm not the only one that hates showering during the first trimester. If the water is hot, I'm nauseous and light headed. If the water is cold, I'm shaking and it's like little pins beating my body. There is no in-between. I have horrible memories of vomiting while showering in my first pregnancy.
While I will tell you I'm feeling 1000% better than I did while pregnant with Pete, this time I'm taking care of two very rowdy boys, so every ounce of energy is taken to entertain them (or at least keep them from doing something crazy enough to accidentally kill themselves) and I have nothing left to give my house (or my poor husband for that matter!). I alternate between being cranky because I feel crappy, and being overjoyed that it's not as bad as the first time. I almost think, if this is it, this is the worst, then I understand all the women who say "I love being pregnant".
I just figure I have to muddle through these next few weeks, while being thankful that I'm not as sick as I was with Pete. I give myself permission to relax and be a slob because I know when the nesting hits later, I'll probably be cleaning the baseboards with a Q-tip and touching up the paint. I'm having a rough time, but I'm enjoying what will be the last few months as a family of four, before the chaos of two boys becomes the chaos of three boys. I have something to get me through these tough weeks that I didn't have when I was sick the first time: the scent of my newborn babies snuggled up on my chest. That warm fuzzy feeling, and the warm fuzzy feelings I get when I think of rest of the special moments in Pete and Chester's lives, and adding Baby Threepeat to the mix. There's a special joy watching your children grow that only a parent can really understand, and it's so much easier to deal with the nausea when you have that to watch and anticipate.
So while I'm being a human incubator on the couch, it's becoming very obvious around my house just what I DO all day or more accurately, what I'm NOT doing all day right now. I think I'll give my friend a call, the one with the pre-teen daughter who wants to be a mother's helper. She can play bubbles and trucks and I'll do a load of laundry!